I Will Not Vote For You

Hello, all.  I’ve missed you!  I have become a bit lonely on my mommy blog.  Not that there aren’t a lot of wonderful women who I connect with, but I am going to leave the mommy blogging to the hilarious ladies.  I miss connecting with others on a deeper level, about things that not everyone can understand unless you have been there.  I have fallen into a blogging slump, even though I constantly feel like there is more I’d like to say.  I think I will be moving back to this blog, at least that is my goal at the moment.  It feels nice to be back and to see that my blog is getting more views than ever in my absence.  I hope I have been able to help others while I’ve been away.

Today I’d like to discuss something that is making me upset.  Deep down in my bones upset.  Lately, social media is the go to move for everyone.  It isn’t just for celebrities and news anymore.  It is for stores, movies, music, and everything else you could think of.  The amount of competitions online is reaching an all time high.  “Like, comment, and share to win ______!”  Well, heck, I’d love to win ______!  Who wouldn’t?  This is fine for things like free scarves, gift cards, Ipods, and things of that sort, but this is not for babies.  Confused?  Let me explain…

For the past couple weeks, I’ve had a friend on Facebook asking everyone to go and vote for her cousin to win a free IVF session.  Now, free IVF is amazing.  Phenomenal, even!  What a prize!  What a gift!  Everyone who has to reach the point of IVF deserves help to achieve this goal.  Not many people on this planet have the type of money to go all willy nilly and do IVF without a second thought.  A lot of people go into tremendous debt in order to start a family, or TRY to start a family, as it is not always successful, and when it isn’t, these families continue to climb into debt.  By the way, I refuse to hear the words “they should just adopt!  It is a guarantee!  They are just being selfish”  Because, no it isn’t a guarantee, and it is just as expensive, takes years, and isn’t at all selfish!  And those who claim it is selfish are usually those who do not struggle.  So, don’t go there, please.

So, yes, she wanted everyone to go and vote for her cousin.  I was intrigued, and quickly disgusted.  I clicked the link and saw that there were at least 50 entries for this contest.  A contest!  Just using that word to talk about this makes me queasy!  Giving the gift of IVF should not be a popularity contest.  These people should not have to put their heart breaking stories online for everyone to see, and have people vote on who’s story is the saddest.  If someone has to do IVF, their story is sad.  Something is preventing them from conceiving a child.  Something you are told is the easiest, most natural thing in the world, is impossible for these people without the help of science.  Expensive science.  Expensive, invasive, emotional, painful science.  And you want to put on a show and make them dance for you?  Shame.  Shame on these fertility clinics that do this to these poor people.  They see these people every single day.  The struggle, the pain, and they smile and say “I know!  We will make them compete!  That will get a lot of traffic on our website!”  Absolutely revolting.

So, no, I will not vote for you, or anyone.  I know what it is like to need to do IVF, to worry about it financially, to long for it emotionally, and I still wouldn’t vote for someone in a situation just like mine, because every vote for person A, is a non vote for person B, C, D, E…..  How can I say that one couple deserves a baby more just because I know them, or a friend knows them?  Why is this happening?  Why doesn’t anyone see why this is a problem?  I understand the desperation on these people, and using them to promote your business is sick.

Cut it out, fertility clinics.  If you want to give someone a free IVF session, do so with a random drawing in-house.  Do not put on a show with these peoples lives and feelings.  IVF is hard enough, but losing your chance because you have less Facebook friends?  Infuriating.